The Rachel Ray Drinking Game!


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I like Rachel Ray. She is quite a character. So much so that a comprehensive drinking game has been developed to recognize her many quirks. Enjoy!

Rachael Ray has such a quirky personality, any of her many shows on the Food Network can make a great drinking game. Here are some rules to use when you’re up for getting sloshed in 30 Minutes or less.

Note: 1 “sip” generally means a reasonable-sized sip of whatever beverage you have in hand, taking into account its alcohol content.
Sayings:
1 sip “EVOO”
1 sip “Guys”
1 sip “Sammie”
1 sip “Healthful”
1 sip “Goin’ on” new!
1 sip “Hang out” new!
2 sips “Stoup”
2 sips “GB”
2 sips “Spoonula”
3 sips “Fry-o-lator”
+1 sip any of the above followed by an explanation of what it stands for, thus making the abbreviation useless
+1 sip any of the above nouns used as a verb (e.g. “I’m just gonna GB this”)
1 sip “Yummo”
2 sips any exotic variant of Yummo, like “Yummilicious” or “Yummerific”
1 sip “Delish!”
1 sip “Awesome”
1 sip “Beautiful!”
2 sip “Chop and drop” new!
2 sips “Shimmy shake”
2 sips “Worcester-sheer-shire sauce” new!
1 sip “I gotta take a quick break” new!
1 sip “It smells good in here already!” new!
1 sip “How _____ is that?”
1 sip “I’m all about _____”
1 sips “Just run your knife through it” new!
1 sips “Room to groove” new!
1 sips “You can seriously entertain with this!”
2 sips … if she’s talking about hamburgers.
2 sips “Some of that action”
2 sips “Back in the day”
2 sips “Daddy”
1 sips “Give it feet”
whole drink creates an all-new and completely unnecessary abbreviation

Stories: new!
2 sips The one about how she has 5 jars of poultry seasoning new!
2 sips The one about how she eats so much garlic she “smells like a salami” new!
2 sips The one about how she ate panzanella every day in Italy new!
2 sips Any story about Boo new!

Presentation:
1 sip repeats herself
2 sips talks for so long without taking a breath that she nearly runs out of air
2 sips makes an awkward, spastic gesture with her arm
2 sips voice cracks
2 sips forces a laugh at something not funny
2 sips tells a lame anecdote about her family
2 sips mispronounces “foreign” words such as “paprika” or “tapas”
2 sips says something that is flat-out wrong
3 sips is visibly flustered

Cooking:
2 sips comes back from refrigerator carrying too many ingredients
3 sips drops something on her way back
4 sips drops something, laughs, and says something like “potato overboard!”
whole drink the thing she drops is a knife!
1 sip fails to provide a measurement and tells you to “eyeball it”
2 sips provides an obviously wrong measurement, e.g. “about a tablespoon” while she dumps in a half-cup of something
2 sips suggests a crappy substitution (e.g. parsley for cilantro) new!
2 sips praises “salad in a sack” new!
2 sips uses a “secret ingredient”
3 sips the “secret ingredient” is nutmeg
1 sip mentions “the thing that makes you go Hmmm”
3 sips “the thing that makes you go Hmmm” is nutmeg
2 sips praises the virtues of Worcestershire sauce new!
+1 sip if she says it contains “secret ingredients”, despite the fact that all ingredients are clearly listed on the label new!
2 sips creates a “healthful” meal that clearly contains over 50g of fat
2 sips does way more work than is humanly possible during a commercial break
3 sips makes a “gourmet” dish out of cheap ingredients (e.g. Tiramisu with nilla wafers and whipped cream)
2 sips expresses how good something tastes while she’s still lifting the fork to her mouth
2 sips takes such a big mouthful of something it takes several seconds before she can talk again
3 sips ruins something and tries to play it off as no big deal
3 sips makes a dish with a name more than 10 words long new!

Travelling:
2 sips leaves a crappy tip
2 sips shoves her nose in something to smell it
2 sips claims a dessert by itself is somehow a legitimate lunch or dinner
2 sips gets something for free (e.g., her boyfriend buys her a sundae) new!
3 sips wears anything midriff-revealing
whole drink gets up on stage with a band new!

One thought on “The Rachel Ray Drinking Game!

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